Googly Joe

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"Googly Joe" is the nickname given to an otherwise unidentified puppet of colossal proportions which emerged from Alphabet City to defend it against scheduled demolition. Based on found footage and eyewitness testimony, Joe is made from an estimated 45,000 square feet of orange felt, and an estimated 6,500 tons of cotton stuffing. He is named after his eyes, which oscillated constantly with alarming speed.

Googly Joe has not been seen since his initial sighting. He is one of only three puppets known to have been recorded on film eating at least one person.

First encounter

By 9:32am on August 3rd, 15 BBO, the city demolition crew, the pest control service, and several members of the LAPD had arrived at Alphabet City for its scheduled demolition. The resident puppets began to sing an improvised song possibly titled "Hey It's Okay Let's All Be Friends" and tried hugging the workers until forcibly dispersed via flamethrower. At this point, the puppets retreated back away from the structure of Alphabet City, rather than their usual strategy of trying to support the structure by hand. This prompted unease among the workers, who after several previous demolitions were used to having to dig shredded puppets out of the rubble. Instead of singing, the puppets began to chant "he rises, he rises" with increasing intensity.

At approximately 10:03am, the order was given for the machines to move in and begin tearing down the exterior of Alphabet City. Seemingly in response, the entire structure began to shake, and an unidentified orange mass emerged from the upper levels, destroying multiple brightly-colored doors in the process. The mass unfurled to reveal itself to be a colossal puppet hand, which seized the closest piece of heavy machinery and crumpled it with levels of force far exceeding what felt and cotton should be able to achieve. The flamethrowers were employed, but the sheer size of the hand made them ineffective.

The remaining machinery was used in an attempt to contain the hand, but only resulted in the emergence of the head. The puppets of Alphabet City continued chanting, now little more than wordless shrieking, as the puppet behemoth shattered much of the remaining structure to extract a second arm and part of a leg. Making nonsense sounds at a deafening volume, Googly Joe consumed the rest of the demolition equipment and several members of the crew, or at least crushed them into a paste between its flat, toothless jaws. Apparently satisfied with the end of the threat to Alphabet City, the giant puppet retreated back into the building, disappearing from sight.

By 11:25am there was no sign of Googly Joe and the resident puppets had returned to what passes for "normal" among puppets, starting another improvised song about finding happiness working together while attempting repairs of Alphabet City. When interrogated about the giant puppet and the events, they showed no signs of understanding the questions being asked, with several individuals singing a song about not knowing the answer to questions. In the following days, the City of Hollywood changed its policy on Alphabet City from destruction to "reasonable containment", pending investigation into Googly Joe.

There has been no second encounter with Googly Joe to date.